Abreast (or two) his comfort zone

So I was chilling after school one night, relaxed in my room, listening to a video created by my Wellness teacher, playing some Minesweeper. The teacher was discussing various drugs and addictive substances. Here’s a transcript of the bit on anabolic steroids.

“… abuse of anabolic steroids has been linked with many health problems that range from unnattractive to life-threatening. They include acne and cysts, breast growth… *pause* Uh, male breast growth… *nervous snicker*”

I just found that amusing.

Overheard at the dadman’s work

“Abraham Lincoln was a vampire. They’re making two movies about it.”

“Hey, uh, you can’t leave until you code your share of the work. So… See you in ten years.”

“Nah, we’ll let him out. Once or twice.”

*indecipherable Chinese/Japanese/someforeignlanguagethatsoundsAsian*

“Man, I can’t wait for those movies to come out.”

“Ooooooh, I’ve got it.*

*uncontrollable laughing*

Conversation: I do not think that means what you think it means…

[After discussing an upcoming project, then being released to 'free study' time...]

Teacher: “Noah, Doug, do your work. I know you both have something to do.”

Noah: “But I’m being creative and using my imagination and engineering skills in Minecraft.”

Teacher: “No. That does not count. Do your work here; you can play Minecraft all you want at home.”

Noah: “But at home I have to do my work.”

Teacher: “…”

Doug: “You know, he does have a point.”