T’was the end of the year

In the way measured by students

They wanted away from here

With all due prudence

It was a day that would never end

Lectures eternal

Thus one chose to send

For an escape that was maternal

He bid adieu

To his many friends

They took the cue

And glared, giving him the bends

The rest remained

Staring with their eyes shut

Til one feigned sickness

Heaving his gut

Another had fled

Filling his classmates with envy

But envisioning a warm bed

They contained the building frenzy

The day wore on

Wearing them thin

After what felt an eon

10 minutes, it had been!

“I cannot survive, I must go now!” a student proclaimed.

“You’re still alive, stay there cow!” a teacher exclaimed.

“I am sure to fall over dead!” he protested.

“Due to lack of brain cells in your head!” the teacher attested.

The sparring continued

the teacher always won

Both sides were rude

Until he announced, “We’re done!”

But then a student rose

And donned his cap

He had a largish nose

And looked like a sap

He challenged the teacher

To one more verbal duel

One final feature

To end school

The teacher laughed

Right in his face

“Are you daft?

“You can’t keep up with my pace!”

“I certainly can,

“And I certainly will!

“Now face me, man,

“And prepare to take ill!”

The battle was long

And often rough

Each was strong

And couldn’t get enough

Terminology and

Etymology and

Phonology and

Philology and

Bibliology and

Characterology and

Codicology and

Demology…

The students could not keep track

Of the flurry of terms

The teacher was called a quack

The student, a can of worms

As a climax was reached

Seething fury flowing

The teacher screeched

“IT’S TIME FOR YOU MAGGOTS TO GO HOME AND START MOWING!”

The bell had rung

As one, all stood

And they all sung

Praise to the hero

Who stood up to the tyrant!

Besting him in every manner,

Equaled by none,

Triumphant conqueror

Of all Englishland!

Over the break

The villain’s house was afflicted

With toilet paper and eggs

Horribly depicted!

And the monster himself

Considered a life of piety

Before saying “screw that!”

And returned to filling student’s lives with fear and anxiety!

подаръци

First, let’s look at some of the aspects of my previous castle to see what we want in this one.

This picture outlines what I want in outer walls of my castle: supports so it looks cool, and windows from the towers so my invisible guards can see the nonexistent enemy before they’re inside the castle.

Ooh, that was a problem with all my walls. Sure, when you’re inside it looks like putting the wood under supports like that will make sure it doesn’t fall out or something, but from outside it looks bad. So I want the supporting columns to be entirely of stone (except, perhaps, for a few of wood inside).

I want windows on every side of the tower.

Ugh, that was difficult. I wanted a tree inside the castle (somewhat reminiscent of Minas Tirith), but I destroyed everything within my construction site. I had to make one myself, and no matter what I did, it looked awful. There are flowers there, if you didn’t notice.

This is my dungeon/cellar. I was going to put a few jail cells in here, and maybe a storage room with TNT, but I didn’t get around to it.

This is my seeeecret escape route. It leads out pretty far, and splits into two, so as to throw off any pursuers. You can enter through the block below the tree or in the dungeon behind a staircase.

Alright. In this castle, we want:
Aesthetically agreeable walls w/ supports
Windows on every side of every tower
A tree
A dungeon w/ cells and maybe a storage room
At least one escape route

After a Google search, I find a few things I should have added to that castle:
Great hall
Chapel
Well (<-- Escape route!!!)
Baileys and wards
Gatehouses
Living quarters
Keeps

Good stuff, eh?

Now that we know what we want, let's find a spot to build. Since you can't select a new spot for your home (there is an option to save and warp home; that's also where you spawn when you open the map after downloading it), I'm going to generate several random maps until I find something I like. I make two or three, then find something nice.

I want to keep a tree or two in the middle, but I need something to guide me by- I need a border. So I start mining to place TNT, but I come upon this:

Thinking on what I know of medieval castles, I realize this is a fantastic border! There’s no way enemies could climb it. Therefore, I set off the TNT I placed behind me as it is.

There’s one of the pits I created. Tomorrow, we’ll start building something.

Here are some maps I found. You can look at maps people post, though only one person can be on the map at any given time. I suppose that helps it run, as there are probably absolutely no animations in this game. No character models either.

Here’s something I built:

I like it, but it’s just a rough draft. I’ve got some technique down, now I’m going to try and make something really impressive. More on that tomorrow.